The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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