my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
