so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
