No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
