Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
