i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
