Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
