So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Randomize
