It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
