He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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