I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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