Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
