I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
i just had sex bonerless
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
