physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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