The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
