i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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