Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Randomize
