It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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