dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize