my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Randomize
