So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Randomize
