how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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