dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
