See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
