Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
