you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
