dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
