Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize