every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Randomize