i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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