Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
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weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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