i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
