Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
