i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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