dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize