I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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