I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
