Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
why do cheetos always look like penises
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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