that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
