I hate your face
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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