I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
