Sry I called you an 8
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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