how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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