He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
vagina is talking i cant
We are two peas in an std pod
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Randomize
