he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
