So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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