sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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