It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Randomize
