i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
How does one acquire holy water?
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
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