I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
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