He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
